Eastman & Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Mirage Studios Volume 1, Issue 11
Story & Art by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird
Read it at NinjaTurtles.com

Dear Diary

June 18, 2008: What a day!  Decided to write this review in a diary style to commemorate/mock how #11 was done.  After escaping the Foot, the Turtles, Splinter, Casey, and April hide out at Casey’s unused Northhampton farm, where April writes down all her thoughts about her strange new friends in her journal.  She’s so sensitive!!  Oh, and I tried that new fish sandwich at that little shop near work — amazing!!!

June 20, 2008: Things have really slowed down for me.  Did a little shopping today, got a haircut.  I think I might go see that weird-looking movie about Winnipeg, but maybe not, because it looks so weird.  There’s just not much going on these days.  Kinda like in #11: they’re just hanging around the farm, training or fixing the truck.  Pretty dull.

June 24, 2008: Got stuck in the subway for an hour today, which sucked, but I got to thinking … I can’t believe it’s been so long since I did any travelling!  I saw all kinds of interesting places back then, but now here I am and it’s the same thing over and over.  I guess the Turtles are feeling it, too — they used to gallivant across galaxies with their robot friends, but now all they see is barn walls and trees.  But I know they’ll be all right, and if they can make it through, then so can I!!

June 26, 2008: Finally, something interesting happened!  I was walking down Yonge Street, when I saw this deer, and I decided to kill it.  But it fought back, and after a heck of a scrap, and a heap of mutual respect, we went our separate ways.  Though I wonder if I let it go out of compassion, or weakness … Kidding!! ;-P Actually, all this happened to Leonardo.  Poor guy, getting beat up by the Foot really did a number to his confidence.  I hope he’ll be all right…

June 27, 2008: It’s my birthday!!!!  What did you get me, diary?  Where’s my cake!!  ( Kidding!! ;-P )

July 3, 2008: Wow!  Has it really almost been a week since my last entry?  Crazy!  I hope you haven’t been feeling neglected the way April has, diary.  Poor girl (sorry, woman!  Not very PC, whoops!!) was attacked by ninjas and lost her home and now she has to hide out in this strange old farm with five monsters and that Casey Jones thug she barely knows (but he’s pretty cute, right April?).  And with the Turtles all having their own problems and doubts, who’s she to turn to for support?   I guess that’s what diaries are for, right diary?  At least they’ve got hot water now — Way to go Donatello!!!

July 6, 2008: I’m sorry, diary, but I think I’m going to have to end this relationship.  You’re a great diary, don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t like the person I become when I’m with you.  Plus, I can’t help but notice this relationship is one-sided.  And I’ve been sleeping with your sister.  What I’m trying to say is get your shit, all your clothes and your unicorn memorabilia, and get out. I am not kidding.

July 13, 2008: Finally, that old diary is gone.  Now it’s just you and me, new diary.  ;-)